What's the most valuable lesson you've learned in life, and how has it impacted your journey so far?

After you lather me up with that strawberry hand lotion.

Yes, Tess, crime doesn't pay but apparently Rated-G horror does.

And then working as Betty and Veronica's body doubles ...

How are max different from medical and minimum security prisons?

Torchy thinks: Maybe I could play a gangster's moll since apparently smoking is still seen as wholesome and American.

But Tess! I mean Betty! I mean Veronica! (I can never remember who is who) which ever one you are, I love you!

I hear you're a stunt-double now for Fred in Scooby-Doo.

If gays can get married, why can't I marry my dog or a cheeseburger?

Speaking of which, poor Cleo Coco has ended up appearing in anti-vice pamphlets.

Before there was MAGA there was … the Comics Code Authority

Shameless vixen! Trollop!

Why are people of mixed race seen as more attractive than non-mixed-race people?

Gadzooks! It's Torchy Todd slumming it in Yugoslavian science fiction! The shame!

Tess' boyfriend, Ed, now works as a Peter Lorre impersonator.

At least until the peyote kicks in ...

What are the pros and cons of arranged marriages?

Sex! Lingerie! Knock knock jokes!

“Your boyfriend is a total perv, mommy.”

Torchy, we're unemployed … And no one is hiring scantily-clad wastrels these days.

What are your thoughts on the dating app "scam"?

Ironically, Wertham focused on stories about crime, singling out Batman and Robin for its gay subtext and Dick Tracy for its violence.

Only zombies dig to rock and roll, daddy-O!

Perhaps now we can explore what being a “gal pal” really means.

Why do nearly all of the answers on Quora have “read more” and when I click on it, I get a virus warning every time? Has anyone else had this happen?

Remember, kids, masturbation will make you see the devil everywhere!

Two letters of transit signed by General De Gaulle … Stimpy, you eediot!

Just you, me, in a vat of lime jello, pulling hair, calling each other names …

After 70 years of the crappiest computers ever made, why does IBM exist?

Marijuana makes Jesus cry!

And I ended up moonlighting in Japanese porn, but the less said about that the better.

I've also been making ends meet ... By appearing in Tijuana splatter comics as Evil Gringo #2.

How many of you have had your parental rights taken away because of lies and no truth whatsoever, and did you prove the lies that were told about you to be false either through drug testing or another way, but still had your rights taken?

TEXT:

Make Nazis afraid again!

Let's do what we always do, lay around half-naked while men make terrible jokes at our expense.

Why do liberals refuse to define what a woman is and what does that mean for the future of feminism?

In order to answer this I came up with a little story that goes like this …

Of all the layoffs, Torchy Todd and her gal pal, Tess Parker, were hit the hardest.

Dick! I heard about the lay-off. What's a square-jaw crime fighter doing these days to bring in the bling?

Are you struggling with weight loss and finding it hard to stay consistent? What’s your biggest challenge when trying to lose weight at home?

Every day is a good day to punch a Nazi! I mean MAGA! I mean the Comics Code Authority! (I can never remember who is who)

Times might be tough … But at least there's one thing we all agree on.

¡Explotando Dick por todos lados!

What do you think of a parent telling their adult child to “keep their personal life to themselves” in relation to talking to them? No reason they should say that it was mean what should I do?

In 1954 complete bastard and censorship campaigner Fredric Wertham published a book for the stated goal of creating a moral panic around comic book's alleged impact on juvenile delinquency. Much like the House Committee on Un-American Activities' disastrous impact on the film industry, the Comics Code Authority (obey, puny humans) put many hardworking comic book characters out of work all because of one poorly written book called …